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Apr 8, 2006

Ah Spring... the season of newness and renewal... a chance to start over. Around this time every year, I take stock of my life. Who am I? Where is it all going? What am I going to have for dinner? But often times, these thoughts to turn negative. Why am I not in better shape? Why canít I maintain a relationship? Why do I lose interest in movies during the opening credits? Is it because Iím actually a super hero who gets things faster than regular people and therefore gets easily bored? I like to think so...

Like a semi-responsible adult, I use this time of year as an opportunity to make change. Iíll do a push up or buy some broccoli. Last year, I bought a bunch of cleaning supplies hoping they would somehow magicly clean my apartment themselves. But these efforts are always just quick spurts, frantic attempts to be different. And, in the end, I revert back to my old ways. I join a gym but never go, my new bicycle sits unassembled in the corner, I try to make an omelet and they end up scrambled eggs.

In time, this vicious cycle started to feel not good. Thatís when it dawned on me that I have never failed at something that I didnít try. I have never failed to complete an Iron Man, Iíve never failed to climb Mt. Fuji. Of course, Iíve never attempted, but thatís not the point.

So, this Spring, Iím trying a completely different approach. Iím not going to change anything. I am going to embrace me. I wonít diet or exercise, Iím not gonna read a book nor will I clean anything out, literally or figuratively. I am simply going to be. I am going to sit back and relax, and compliment myself on another winter well played. Iím gonna eat cupcakes for breakfast and stay up so late watching TV that I can only keep on eye open. And when that eye shuts Iím gonna listen to TV. And when I wake up on the couch in the same clothes I fell asleep in, Iíll be happy cause Iím already dressed for the day.

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